Christmas Eve Day

A little alone time before family time.  Horrible panic attacks last night.

Let's work this out

Grateful 

1 waking up

2 my Yukon 

3 coffee

It is hard being with your kids every day all day.  I get to the point where just the sound of their voice is irritating to me.  How can I be so upset with Maggie when she keeps asking me to read her more books?  I just want to be left alone for a few minutes.  I feel myself acting horrible towards them with so much disconnect. I want to be excited about them and what they say and do. 

Bake first batch of gingerbread and sugar cookies

These two are my reason for wanting more.  I never want them to have these feelings. I see too much of me in them.  I want them to live life, trying things, never letting others dictate how they feel.

Losing it

PANIC DISORDER 

I need help and strength. I don't feel as if I will make it. I am physically and mentally drained. 

I want my life back because what I am doing now isn't living. It's just waiting and worrying about dying.

Health Anxiety

Doom

Helplessness

Body is worn out, I am killing myself with this stress.

Never wanted to give up but feel I can't pull through this.  

Redo. Ripping out the bushes Aaron killed. Putting up raised beds!

Dr Suess Bday crafts

What is this!

This snack mix is usually made with chocolate but this version I found is made with Nutella. We love Nutella in this household, like most I am sure.

Melt one stick butter with a little more than one cup Nutella in sauce pan over medium low heat.
In a bowl add six cups chex and one and half cups salted nuts, pour Nutella mixture over the top and stir. Completely coat cereal.
Place cereal in sack and add one and half cup powdered sugar.
Let cool then enjoy!